Fairy tale of Saripudin

Since I was child, my father train

me like dog's police..he say sit

i will sit like machine..i will not

move at all man..not even an inch..or

cm-whichever is the smallest..

the thing is that

i am discipline mannn...

my dad with sniper..he is cool

so I do not have emotion at all,

nope..cause I am police's dog..

no emo at all..all I do is smell,

treat(eat), discover...that's all my duty..

yeah..not to mention I also have to

do 3P which is every routine..

Play Pee Poop..but infront of my dad,

i can't do that 3p..he will kill me if I

do that cause he want me to be machine..

u know what machine do? they obey!

this is me

so one day after I graduated from my father

which is Left. Kol. Encik Black Star, he said to

me "son this is the time, it's time to be in

real war...serius shiat..LOL- that's funny..

SHIAT..lol..anyway my son..just be your self.."

so here is my ultimate test..to ngorat anak cik

Senah, Maznah, who is pug kind of dog..ala the one

acting in the Men In Black tu..don't remember??

u sick..

anyway, I walk to taman kupu2 simpang renggam

to meet her..every day she will pass by the taman

after sekolah pendidikan seni together with borhan..

borhan damn u..big fat ugly monster dog..today

is my luckiest day when I just see Maznah..alone..

so I just lie down..showing that I am not mean

machine that I used to be..so I use tactic no #3

which is charming thing..my father told me to smile

but I hate my father's smile..it's like my foot..LOL.

so when she pass by I pon buat la tactic tu(susah nak

buat ayat dalam english eh)..there she goes like this..

just like that man..just like that..

instead I can get her phone number, I only get

bad barking including insult saying that

"anak beranak sama je..eh awak, mak saya tak

hingin dengan bapak awak yang askar lapuk tu..

awak pon ada hati ke..sya dah tunang la.."

my heart just crush like watermelon throw

from 7th floor to the floor..after that I just

report to jabatan kebajikan masyarakat

to take care of my father..as for me..

life is just began..

yang benar

saripudin the machine..wof wof

p.s picture sources

1

2

4

Nurul Amin the Obidient Child

I only have 15 minutes to write on
this post and I am going to use it
wisely..

ok here we go..

One a upon a time,
there was a sheep called
Nurul Amin.. Lets
just call him(male sheep)
Amin..

Nurul Amin when he is
3 years old.






Amin is a very kind sheep..
He always obey his father command..
His father is very fat and cannot
walk..so his father just
sat on the sofa and drink
soya bean every day..

So one day, his father ask him
to meet his uncle Luwie Susonto
(Javanese sheep) in Pakan Baru
and give something and must bring
it back...
so he walked 3 hours bringing
this bulky thing behind his back..

So he met uncle Luwie with
his girlfriend at the kandang
Pakan baru..(left picture)







"What!! again!!,,,your
father is very useless"Uncle Luwie
speak loudly
 "Please uncle, take and do something.."said Amin

"Ok..first plug it first..and switch it on..
what!! your father forgot to dump
this thing"Uncle Luwie said..




"what is it? can it kill sheep?"
Amin is very frightened and started
to run.

"Wait...wait...Amin..I fixed
it..your father just forgot
clean the toilet of the
digipet.."Uncle Luwie laugh out
loud..lol..lol..





Amin just don't understand what
Uncle Luwie said, but one thing for
sure..He must get this bulky(computer)
thing as soon as
possible because he don't
want to be called..







Ungrateful Child (Anak Meraka- DUrhaka)

Short Novel

Title: The King and Mubarak

Genre: Fantasy
Rating: General
Exception: None
Special consideration: No Skimming at all!
Preparation: spectacle for cannot-see-without-it-person


Once a pond a time,
there was a century where cat
is a leader and fox as a follower..

Cat is very strong at that time and
their body is bigger than a can of
planta... However, there was
a cat who is smaller than their species
called Mubarak Hashim (left pic)..

Mubarak Hashim is smaller ten times than
the ordinary cat at that time...He is often
bullied and often been asked to buy roti canai
at Mat Topedo Mamak Stall..


One day, in the bright afternoon the queen
of this country, Queen Rahimah the third(look left
picture pls)by her messenger
called out this message..

"To all my citizens of Cat of Spanyol..I Queen
Rahimah the third is so boring because
laying on my bed all day long and watch this
fox acting like clown..I am indeed bored by their
unprofessional way of make joke...so I
as a leader would offer 10,000 freskies(some sort of
food that is so tasty) for free
if you guys can cheer me up..plus there are
insurance waiting for the winner..Hence,
there is no rules, as long as I laugh..
regards, flaw from Queen Rahimah the third"

Mubarak who is inspired by Jim Carrey started
to find ways to make the queen lol (laugh out lung)..
so Mubarak make research every day and ask
old folk to tell the dikir barat joke to imitate..
Until one day he is mentally ready..

One d-day..every cat in the city line up
all the way to castle...all of the cat seems ready
except Mubarak..his underarm sweating a lot
that is why he is wearing deodorant..



Sometimes he heard the queen yelling

"STOP STOP not the violin again..
this is not funeral you cat!! this is
joke contest..now guard.."


"Yes Queen"the guard said


"Take this cat to the jail..he make
me more sad...and feed him with
grass for a week..."


"Right away Queen..you just make
the queen mad pal, and spoil my card
game.." the guard said angrily




Nasir the guard almost pawn
Wahab(not in the picture)

That incident make Mubarak more
nervous...

Finally his turn...Mubarak try to calm down..
spray more deodorant..and

"What is your name son?"asked the queen

"Mubarak my lord(bow)..can I start?"

"Sure...you look very confident..
make me laugh bebeh..if not
i will cut your mustange(misai).."

With full of confidence Mubarak
throw something..the queen
suddenly run and play with that
thing..and start lol lol lol like there
is no tomorrow...rolling here and
there..and the guard started to
laugh too...and the whole castle
has to purposely laugh if not
the queen will cut their tongue..

This only illustration of the
queen playing around with
Mubarak's secret weapon


Mubarak since then is the local
comedian with salary of three
meatball, 10,000 friskies and
1 second hand pumpkin car used by
cinderella with berjaya insurance...








This is Mubarak after been crown
"Most influence cat of the year"


This is the portrait of
Queen Rahimah the third..
May her spirit covered by wool...

Squirrel and straw factory

It should be noted that
a person who has mad cow disease and
temporary sawan cannot read this story..
It is not some sort of discrimination but
it is kind of safety requirement by
mr freak life viewers.

the story starts now...

On a tree near pekan Tambun there
was squirrel named Saripudin...he lived
with his dad..his dad is single divorce
or in short simple term called duda..this is
because his mom run away with Appu(a koala)...
they ran to unknown location..

Anyway Saripudin has deep desire to walk
along the estate area..but his father said

' you are 4 years old son..you can't handle
the hotness of sun and you cannot lower your
gaze(pandangan)..'

Saripudin replied
'why should I lower my gaze..this is open world
dad..gosh..you should read Oprah magazine..'

His father's face turn red brownish
'just listen to me son..Janda Salmiah is hotter
than you think..that is why I don't want you
to involve in my situation..damn John(western
squirrel), he want to get hand of Janda Salmiah..'

And that particular day in the evening
Saripudin left note to his father that sound like
this

' deer dad..i hate you when you control my life..
i just want to walk around the estate but
you refuse to give me chance...U sick dad..
anyway I left Oprah magazine for you to read..
i love u dad..
p.s: I will be back this evening..'

On the way to Taman Estate, Hutan Simpan..
Saripudin saw a big bottle of water..black one..but
look tasty..

'My dad is genius..how can he knew I cannot stand
the hotness of sun..now I have to drink this water..'

so he think..and think...and think
for hours how to drink that black water..
so he try to remember how human
drink, especially when they go to
fancy restaurant..of course..straw!

so he went to the nearer dustbin
and search for straw...and then he
drink the black water with
only one inhale(sekali napas)!!!






Suddenly he became feel very
energetic and started to be very strange
and this story is no longer relevant to the
reader especially with low carbohydrate
insulin..so the story end here...Saripudin
however manage to return in the
evening but his father rotan his back 4 times
because late 4 minutes for evening snack..bye

Munawer the Independent Rooster...

Once a pond a time, there was a rooster named Ahmad Munawer..
Munawer liked to eat rice and drink coke..

This is Munawer..he is male..of course

His mother said..."no son..no more
coke, because we are chicken..."

Munawer replied.."but why our owner
mr Ah Keong can drink coke and we can't..
this is one type of discrimination mama chicken"

After arguing for a little while(shorter than nokia ringtone),
Munawer apologize to his mother and said

"I am sorry mama chicken..I just want to feel
the pleasures of freedom..I want to ask
your permission to be popular mama chicken"

"But what about mama(pointing to herself)
...mama want you to buy cikedis
(some sort of jajan) seldom-ly..
it's ok son, if that u want..I
will give you
permission
but never forget to give me a crow(menyalak)
once you succeed.."

Munawer felt heavy(feeling) to accept condition made by his mother because
his crow(nyalakan) is not outstanding and sometimes off tunes
..anyway, he accept it as a challenge..

"Good bye mama chicken..give gentle
regard to duda hashim.."

His mum just smiled and wave with her
wings..she hope her son, Munawer will be
famous..

Once day, a cow name Mat run very fast
toward Munawer's mother..
Mat said..

"Your son.....is...."

mama chicken
"What?!.. is he popular now.."

Mat replied fast like 3 seconds
"Yes..indeed..but..."

mama chicken
"Wow..it is enough Mat..no
need to explain..now I want to tell
duda Hashim..He must be proud too.."
she sing happily and move her
wings according to her own
rhythm.

Mat just can't believe that mama chicken
proud that his son become like this...




This is not Munawer but this is some sort of
illustration..

This is Munawer..so poor..he must be crow-ing
so loudly..i am also crowing..i can't believe i am so cruel to write this story,


* Crowing = berkokok..

based on tales..i write this thirty minutes ago..plus thinking time 20 minutes..